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Jack and Jill went up the hill and then slid down it on the other side on a board and were given a gold medal for their efforts.

*Note from the blogger — prior to publishing this post, a similar post of similar occurances was posted over at Waste Of Heels, a fabulous blog written by the incomparable-even-though-she’s-cheering-for-Canada-today-Lady B. This basically means that she’s me, but in Canada, and you should be reading her post too.

If you live in Michigan, you’re supposed to do winter-y things. Depending on your level of skill, this means sledding, or tubing, or snowman building, or if you’re truly talented, properly cleaning off your car so as to not be that douchebag that drives down the road with it flying off the roof at other motorists.

From the hilarious blogography.com. If you haven’t read that blog, you’ve got issues.

Now, I’m not saying that I don’t have winter activity skills…I’ve successfully built a number of snowmen in my time, and gone sledding and tubing while growing up, and there was this one time when my Girl Scout troop decided it would be an awesome idea to go cross country skiing, and I’m pretty sure I didn’t fall then.

Here am I. In a tube. Getting pulled up a mountain.

Here am I. In a tube. Getting pulled up a mountain.

…but if you haven’t noticed, sometimes I am occasionally…accident prone.

I saw my friend TomSelleck recently, and our conversation went like so:

Him: So do you have any new bruises?

(The answer is no.)

So, when my friend Arrington texted me that he wanted to go snowboarding for his birthday, I was all…

Laura Thought Bubble

I’ve been snowboarding exactly three four times in my life (now including the recent birthday festivities).

The last time I went, while attempting to figure out this “tow rope,” I fell.

That’s right.

Not coming down the mountain, but attempting to go up the damn thing. I fall within the first seconds of holding on to this rope, and since we had decided to try snowboarding on Christmas Eve, the place was basically deserted. No one was around to give me advice or maybe tell me,

DO NOT CONTINUE TO HOLD ONTO THE TOW ROPE.

Which means that I made it up the mountain. Hanging on for dear life to this rope. On my ass.

I showed up to Cannonsburg thinking we’d have a nice klatch of the high school crew, CoSi and FunSized to maybe be as skillful as I am and chuckle the whole way [potentially on my backside] down  the mountain.

It turned out to be Arrington, his girlfriend (who brought her own skis), and me.

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Arrington attempted to walk me through the basics of everything so I wouldn’t make a complete ass out of myself, and I actually made it down various hills of various sizes without too much bodily harm or embarrassment.

The Typical “Run” of L.A. down a Mountain on a Board

Start at top of hill. Congratulate self on making it up the mountain on the murderous rope of towing without falling. Strap foot in.

Arrington tells me to make sure that some foot that does something is either in front or in back because that’s the foot I can use for like steering or bracing myself or something like that. There is silent acknowledgement that I do not know how to steer.

Point snowboard down mountain because that seems like a pretty reasonable choice. Began sliding down mountain. Realize that I’m standing and not falling and try to keep my gleeful “sqee” noises to a minimum. I figure a deadpan face will make it look like I know what I’m doing.

The "I'm probably going to hurt myself and laugh about it when the bruises go away" face

The “I’m probably going to hurt myself and laugh about it when the bruises go away” face

Do a sort of turn to keep heading down mountain. Realize that snow seems to help with steering in the fact that it is making me go ways that I don’t think I was choosing to go. Pray that people know to get out of my way. Arrington tells me to use my back leg as a rudder to steer. I think rudders steer boats. This makes sense until another turn makes my back leg my front leg and I realize that I might not have full control of all my limbs and debate what I can blame this on when I inevitably crash.

Probably a spider bite. Paralyzed left leg. Have no control over it.

Realize I’m going incredibly fast. Arrington basically walks up to me because his normal speed is my fast and tells me ways to lean to slow down.

I lean. I slow down. It’s extremely effective. I remind myself to not forget the slowing down part.

Still going fast. Kind of freaking out. Realize that slowing down does not mean stopping and that the end of the mountain is getting close.

Lean. Lean. Lean. Lean. LEAN. LEANING.

Sit down on mountain. Stop. Am reminded of roller blading around my neighborhood as a youth, when I just jumped in the grass and hugged a tree to stop.

Did that on purpose, guys. I’m at the bottom of the mountain, guys. I didn’t even really fall, guys.

this was from the time that I went up the mountain on my ass, because I did not take a photo this time of me on a board because all my limbs were busy trying to keep myself from falling.

this was from the time that I went up the mountain on my ass, because I did not take a photo this time of me on a board because all my limbs were busy trying to keep myself from falling.

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the [snowboarding] Sunday, currently.

It’s honestly kind of relaxing to write the currently. This is my third Sunday, currently (Read One and Two here) and I feel a little better about posts constantly going up here on Chicks in the Mitt, because the prompts just clear my head out of all the drivel that gets in the way. You know who else likes writing prompts? English Teachers — like the one that had me write about the time my house caught fire while I was in the shower.

That’s a story, for real.

R E A D I N G Millions of old school assignments. I booted up an old family computer to pull off some tax information and found basically all my school work saved from about 6th grade through senior year of high school. I was quite the little story teller. 

W R I T I N G Valentine’s Cards, to go out for #LettersFromLA. I’ve been taking part in A Month of Letters, which means I’ve sent a piece of mail out every possible day of February thus far. You’re welcome, Grandma.

L I S T E N I N G to The Civil Wars’ cover of Between the Bars. I love the Civil Wars, so when I heard on NPR that an EP would be released on iTunesI  got excited and have been listening to this on repeat ever since. Also awesome — their cover of I Want You Back is amazing.

T H I N K I N G that I really wish I had more capable video making capabilities, because I love singing some of Joy Williams’ (of the Civil Wars) harmonies. Harmonizing with me, myself, and my sub par guitar skills sounds like a good time.

W I S H I N G I had a little bit more skill at guitar. Granted, considering the amount of time I’ve dedicated to it, I’m not terrible. But I kind of am. And I definitely wish I was better. Anyone giving out guitar lessons for free? Bueller? Bueller?

H O P I N G  for no soreness tomorrow. I spent part of the morning and early afternoon snowboarding with my old friend Arrington and his girlfriend. This brings my grand total of times I have snowboarded to four. Yes, I did fall. Mostly because I chose to fall, since I’m not very good at just stopping. Anyone not giving away free guitar lessons that is giving away free snowboard lessons?

W E A R I N G two different pairs of pants with zippers at the ankles. I’m so 1999. I don’t even know how one ends up with two pairs of ankle zipping pants, let alone ends up wearing them simultaneously, like some sort of zippered superhero.

L O V I  N G that I’m going to see The LEGO movie today. Boo might be excited, but I am ecstatic. 

W A N T I N G some Hot Cocoa, because that seems like the appropriate drink for the winter activities thing that I did earlier.

N E E D I N G to do some actual writing. I’ve been writing in the second book of my I’m not published, but at least now the first book is finished series and have hit a wall. I’m not sure what it is — but everything I’ve written lately for it just sounds like crap when I read it back. I need to sit back and take a break from it,  but at the same time, I just want to get it done. Also. I need to figure out what I’m going to do now that the first book is completed. Online publishing, maybe?
F E E L I N G like writing — but a completely different story from the one I just mentioned. Maybe I’ll just start an entirely new book. It’ll probably be about like…love. Or vampires. Or magic. Or fantasy. Or Dystopia. What’s popular nowadays, anyway?

.Link up to the Sunday, Currently here.