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Politics, Schm-olitics.

Do you remember a period of time, where you would be in line at the grocery store/sitting at a bar/some other social situation, and you would hear someone else’s conversation and really, really, really want to butt in with your two cents?

Basically, it was life before twitter. You couldn’t just just hit the ‘reply’ button and interject yourself into someone else’s conversation. Well, you could, but that didn’t mean you were welcome to or that whoever you were about to spew your opinion on was going to appreciate it.

Granted, the same goes for twitter, but you’re on twitter. You have to understand on there that someone might not appreciate what you’re going to say, or might argue with you, or might unfollow you, or all sorts of fun consequences for whatever your 140 character opinion is.

Credit to DavidDrury.com. Click photo for link.

I’m in line at the grocery store with two packages of toaster strudels, a can of red bull because i’m weak, and the Bastille CD because it was on sale and I seriously heard it was good and yes, I still buy CDs.

So, the person in front of me is buying her groceries with her kid and talking to the cashier about life. I’m half listening because I’m within earshot. The conversation is vaguely political – the Mom is asking the cashier if he plans to watch the State of the Union.

Their conversation, paraphrased, because when it got interesting I started taking notes on my phone.

Mom: The State of the Union will be on this week. Are you going to watch it?

Cashier: No, ma’am. Probably not.

Mom: Why not? Aren’t you concerned about the country?

Cashier: Yeah, I mean, I guess.

Mom: Then you really should be watching. Are you over 18?

Cashier: Yes, ma’am.

Mom: Did you vote in the last election?

Cashier: No, ma’am.

Mom: Why not?

Cashier: …I didn’t really care.

Mom: You should do research. You should be educated.

Cashier: Yes, ma’am.

I don’t like getting into political conversations, because let’s be honest, people are not always going to get along. And when it comes to politics, there’s a good chance that it gets heated and may not end well.

Photo from Keep Calm Studio. Click for link.

I once made a comment on Facebook about something political, to which the person responded:

Obviously, you’re a Democrat and I’ll be defriending you now.

And I was defriended.

Back to the situation at hand.

This woman is lecturing the cashier and I’m half debating if I’m on an episode of What Would You Do and if I should fucking say something. No one wants to be the person that John Quinones comes up to and asks WHY they didn’t do something, after all.

John Quiñones, in all his glory. Photo from hollywoodreporter.com Click for link.

Mom: Do you know who was running in the last election?

Cashier: Obama?

Mom: And?

Cashier: …

Mom: Do you know what political party Obama is?

Cashier: …Um…

She’s berating this guy. Like, he only wants to ask her if she wants paper or plastic and she’s probably all set to give him a pop quiz on the America government. I’m seriously going through potential things I can say in this conversation, and if I have the guts to say them.

Mom: Do you know what political party you are?

Cashier: …I…

But then.

Mom’s kid: I don’t think I’d want to go to any political party because it doesn’t look like any of them have any fun.

My abbreviated notes from eavesdropping. I really need to work on my shorthand.

My abbreviated notes from eavesdropping. I really need to work on my shorthand.

I have a new found hope in the youth of our country.

Talk quietly, I’m probably listening.

We all know how completely relationship-phobic I am. But honestly, sometimes, I see, you know,  the happy peopleand I miss it.

There are always the good parts and the bad parts to a relationship and I know this — I know that you have to put forth the work to be with someone you love, and that you have to accept the differences, and that every relationship is a partnership.

 

But then.

I know that some relationships are bat-shit crazy.

I’m not normally an aggressively loud person. Which means, if I’m…

…in line behind you at the post office.

…sitting at a table near you at Starbucks.

…lounging at the park and you’re walking by.

That I might happen to overhear you and your significant other. And I might happen to wonder WTF, people. Why are you together?

Overheard:

Man: You can’t be mad at me.

Woman: I told you not to put it there. I told you.

Man: We don’t have to discuss everything.

Woman: This we do.

Man: I’m over this.

Woman: I’m over you.

Man: But it comes out!

At this point, I’m sure they’re about to break up. Obviously, they have terrible communication skills, and he did something that she did not appreciate and to make it worse, he didn’t even try to talk to her about it, which means she was caught by surprise and then it sounds something possibly got stuck.

They’re totally breaking up.

Woman: It won’t! You fucking ruined our coffee table!

Follow me on twitterwhere I post random things like this all the time. Except on Mondays. I just complain on Mondays.