The Troubles with Second Base

Training for my 10 mile run and going to Zumba have really started to give me results for my physique. I don’t look like a body builder, but I feel like a much healthier person.

There is only one part of my body that hasn’t had much transformation because of working out.  And really hasn’t since 5th grade.

People… that would be my chest.

I’ve never been part of itty bitty titty committee and I should be feel blessed, but there are down falls to having a chest.

Table cloth or a shirt…

I’m a petite person except for my chest. Most cases I have to purchase a size bigger to give my two chest roommates space to breath. Having to make this accommodation makes me look like I’m wearing a table cloth instead of an actual t-shirt. The table cloth curse also occurs, I do not own a white shirt that doesn’t have a stain on the chest area. It never fails… I put on a  shirt and ten minutes later a stain magically appears on my chest shelf.


Running blind…

I’ve been running 3 times week to get ready for my race, but I have to plan my laundry days so I have enough clean sports bras. Ladies with chests don’t have the luxury to run free. It’s could turn into a disaster. If I don’t strap down my precious cargo I could injure myself. Things could start flying around uncontrollably, hitting me in the face.


Victoria does have a secret…

It’s slim picking when I go bra shopping. Since I don’t have to fake it to make it, I don’t get the choice of the colorful fun bras at Vikki’s. I get stuck with three choices: white, tan and black. The fun bras usually have too much padding, giving too much push-up. If I were to risk wearing the bright colorful bra with padding, I could endanger myself by being suffocated with my two attached boulders. I like breathing so I stick with the bland pickings.

huge bra gigantic humongous large funny

Long live the bigg girls.


About GoldDust

Gold Dust… IS: Not a Hotch…but is pretty awesome. an Arab-fanatic, but has only dated a Persian. A cock-pollution survivor. Poof’s puppy’s best friend. A tale-teller, an advice giver, and blondette to boot. too friendly to the homeless. LOVES: a lot of things, a boy from liggett, old lady clothes, velvet coats, red dresses, being on TV, holding microphones, berets, serpents, fuzzy ear muffs, stevie nicks, peacocks, beards and volvos, and hand warmers, oh, and cheerios. HATES: critters, clingers, people who can’t properly drive a stick shift, pre-mature ejaculation, half-Persians, quit dresses.

Posted on June 14, 2013, in PSA, Sporty type things that aren't hockey, Walk, Walk, Fashion Baby, We Think We're Funny, Words and Phrases and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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