Religion, Catholicism, or other button pushing topics.

If you didn’t run after reading the title, k, thanks, i love you. 

After I titled this post, I stared at it for a solid two minutes, because everyone is going to run away to avoid conflict, or else come in to argue.

And this post isn’t even really that controversial. Like, at all.

Well, Beethoven might be pissed. (Picture from

At the moment, the Grand Rapids People of Epic Porportions of Awesome Choir is preparing to sing Missa Solemnis. 

Courtesy of Wikipedia

Courtesy of Wikipedia

You know what’s fun about singing pieces like this? Standing for elongated periods of time. Missa Solemnis comes in at approximately 80 minutes. That’s a lot of sitting and standing, and sitting and standing, and folder holding, and proper posture, and oh yeah, you’re singing too. BTW.

Pause for a choir joke.

How many second sopranos does it take to change a lightbulb?

Zero, they can’t reach that high!

Pause for laughter.

So, we’re in choir on Monday night, and our director neglected to tell us that she’d actually just gotten her license to teach an aerobics class and that we would be sitting and standing and sitting and standing and sitting and standing in rapid succession.

Cue the following tweets* of hilarity. Names and faces have been blocked to protect the innocent.

Catholic MassIf you aren’t Catholic, then maybe you don’t understand. If you are, then kudos to you. And also. Let us kneel.

We now ask you to open your hymn books because 17 of you are going to sing, 12 of you are going to open and close your mouths as a form of participation, and the rest of you are going to fiddle in the pews until the song is over.

Tom Lehr

(Lyrics courtesy of the great Tom Lehrer — the Vatican Rag!)

Following today’s service, there will also be a confessional. Please line up accordingly.

Bless me, father.


*Please don’t tell my director about the tweeting. Believe me, I know my music. I study my score while I’m at work**.

**Please don’t tell my boss about the music learning while at work. I always get my work done, and occasionally I sleep less to finish***.

***Please don’t tell my mother I’m not sleeping. She worries.


About L.A.

Mom Life/Engaged Life/Blog Life/Love Life

Posted on April 11, 2013, in Merriments, PSA, We Think We're Funny, Words and Phrases and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

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