Today is my parents’ anniversary. The real one, since they have two, but only one of those dates makes them married for another year. It amazes me sometimes, to think of this.

A few years ago, my father and I were driving to choir, and had the following conversation, which is documented for posterity in my memoir completely fictional book.

“Hey Dad.” I slid into the car, relishing the warmth of the car.

“That wasn’t Ryan.” He replied as a greeting.

“Nope, that was Jack.” He had met Jack a few weeks ago when Jack and I had hid out at my house.

“Are you with Jack now?”

“No, Ryan and I are still dating.”

“Are you and Jack dating?” He asked.

“Ryan and I are boyfriend-kind of dating, Dad.”

He laughed. “Whichever way that is. I think you should ditch them both and date the cute tenor.”


Not dating?

Relationship dating?

Dating dating?

And then you look at my parents. Marriage. 29 years of marriage, and counting. If you happen to read my good friend Nathan Triple Name over at the Frogly Prince, you’ll notice that we worked together to compare Clue to…sexcapades. We had branched out in our original comment-versation to include other various board games.

Wanna play?

Wanna play?

So, exactly how does this marriage thing link in to Monopoly?

Once, when I was about 9, my sister, my father, and I decided to play a friendly game of Monopoly. It began after dinner, and somewhere around it’s midnight and past your bedtime, we put the game away. However, before doing so, we wrote down exactly what everyone had: properties, houses, money, even what piece they were ( I was the dog). No one actually won. We never actually finished the game.

And that is kind of like relationships nowadays.


Thus, Nathan Triple Name and I present you: Relationopoly.

The Cheap Streets: 

L.A.: One night stands. Booty calls. Friends with benefits. Rebounds. Those people that come into your life your bed and head out the door. Possibly saved in your phone as “So and so from the bar.” Possibly not saved in your phone at all.

Nathan Triple Name: Good for some cheap thrills but no one in their right mind should be drooling over Baltic. Even if the  upkeep is cheap, hotel optional.

Spending Time Together Avenues: 

L.A.: You’ve gone on a date or two. To a movie. Grabbed dinner together. Happy hours. He’s met some of your friends, you’ve met some of his. You’re affectionately “just hanging out,” as you tell your friends.

Nathan Triple Name: Not your ideal situation, but at least you are on the board. Tempting to buy that house you always wanted.

L.A.: This is where that forlorned look comes into play. You’re staring around the corner wondering what would happen if the two of you headed there. Of course, there is always the option of getting to Free Parking. Where some relationships go to stay.

Commitment Blvd: 

L.A.: You call him your boyfriend. You’ve had serious conversations, both about life and about “your life. Together.” Oh, and most importantly, you changed your Facebook status.

Nathan Triple Name: Sometimes comes with it’s share of water works and B.O. , but you have to take the bad with the good sometimes to keep moving forward. 

And last but not least…

“Go to Jail” 

L.A.: Of course, this rests between these streets. Somewhere between “hanging out” and commitment, is the great question of what, if anything, comes next.

Nathan Triple Name: Where only guys are sticking around trying to roll doubles. “Twins, Basil. Twins.”

The long and winding road home: You’ve moved in together. You’ve caught him looking at engagement rings. You’ve looked at rings together. He’s met your family. He’s proposed. You bought a dog. You had a kid.

Somewhere between my father and mother pen-palling it up and getting married, love and relationships got blurry. Are you dating? Are you together? Are you in limbo? Are you in a relationship? Go directly to jail. Do not pass GO. Do not collect $200.

If Boardwalk and Park Place are love and marriage, what happens if you keep going around the board?

Maybe the whole issue is that damn bloggers like Nathan Triple Name and I are comparing life to board games.

In the meantime, my parents have been married for 29 years now. Did they learn to play the game correctly? Or maybe

they decided to put away the board game, because let’s face it…they won.

I dedicate this post, and all future games of Monopoly, to my parents. Congratulations of 29 years of love and stuff.

Dear Parentals, Love you.

Dear Parentals, Love you.

Also, a big thank to you to Nate for adding some man talk to my blog this week. Two thumbs up to him — go check out his blog at


About L.A.

Mom Life/Engaged Life/Blog Life/Love Life

Posted on April 5, 2013, in Words and Phrases and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.

  1. thefroglyprince

    Reblogged this on The Frogly Prince.

  2. at this point in my life i highly doubt i will ever find someone who i want to marry. i only ever date arses… 😀

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