It’s deer hunting time here in Michigan. Also, Twilight Part XXILV: Vampires have children who sparkle and grow came out. Which means that last night, my facebook feed looked something like this.
Hunter: I shot this f*cking deer, sparkly.
Robby: I could have caught him with my sparkly teeth, asshat.
Of course, I’ve made plans to go see Twilight, and made arrangements with numerous people that are venturing out in the woods in their camo attire to bring me back some damn jerky. Namely, because I hate the deer. But also, because I love the jerky. I really have no excuses for seeing Twilight.
Conversation from choir on Deer Season/Twilight Opening night:
Alto: You’re seriously going to see Twilight?
Me: Yes. I’ve seen all the movies. I’ve been sucked in.
Alto: I don’t get it though. It’s just vampires that sparkle.
Me: Not even that. They’re good hearted vampires. They don’t eat people. They’re vegetarian.
Alto: Don’t they drink blood?
Me: Well, yes, but not human blood. They kill like…lions. And bears. And deer.
Alto: That doesn’t even make sense.
Me: BUT IT DOES. Not only that. But today is opening day for Deer hunting. It’s like they called KPatz and were like, these deer are a big fucking problem.
Alto: Your point being?
Me: Deer cause all sorts of accidents in Michigan. They’re like crime fighting against all the deer. Working together for a common good.
Alto: …let’s not hang out anymore.
Have you seen Twilight yet? Can we see it together? I’m having trouble finding people who haven’t seen it yet who won’t make fun of me for wanting to see it. (That makes sense, right?)
Absolutely. I won’t judge you because I’m already judging myself and I’ll love you more for not judging me. Get it?
oh my gosh! i can’t stop laughing! this is hilarious!
i guess you watched twilight by now. i’m going to watch it on friday. i’ve heard that the movie is nothing like the book. i can’t wait to find out if it’s true.
OH, let me know what you think!! For part of it, I was just sitting there with my jaw dropped thinking, “NUH-UH, WTF!”
honestly… i think it was the worst of all the twilight movies. i stopped liking the books the moment bella got pregnant and the same happened with the movies. however, i loved alice’s “vision”. i didn’t cry but i really thought it was for real.
RIGHT? I was in shock. Like. E’RYBODY DIES. E’RyBODY DIES. SPARKLES EVERYWHERE!
i know… it’s so weird… i mean… it was pretty cool of them to “fake” all their deaths because i bet a lot of girls cried their little hearts out when they thought it was real.
NOT CARLISLE!!! Lol. I legit whispered that.
and i almost shouted “what the hell!???? he didn’t die in the book!!!” haha
LOL. they just threw everyone off!!
i know… i would have been sooo pissed if they really changed the ending
…it definitely made things more interesting though – I’ll give them that!
it definitely did… but i am still not as sad as i was when harry potter was over. nothing can beat harry potter!!
I LOVE HARRY POTTER. I’m still waiting for my owl.
nothing will ever be as good as harry potter, that’s a fact.
and i’m still waitung for my owl too but not to be a student but a teacher at hogwarts!!!
Mad Eye Malu?!
i thought… mrs cedric diggory
HA. Sold!!